I
have travelled to Norfolk for my annual summer season on an archaeological dig.
The peace of the countryside is a blessing compared with the city noises but in
recent years my poor ability to hear has ruined the fun and involvement. It is
with new excitement and some trepidation that I join the loud, happy,
spontaneous crowd of excitable people.
The
unfamiliar voices all blend in to one but, as I meet those I know, the words
settle into conversations not done so easily for several years. The crowd of
speakers is difficult to handle but close up the processor picks out the words
for me. Each time I look up people have moved and I didn’t notice but the words
are still coming at the same volume and unknown direction with that same
strange tone. This gives me many different people speaking with one voice at a
soft comfortable level but without variations. I talk around a table to a group
of four people all contributing to the conversation. Previously, if someone was
not talking directly to me they would have to be passed by. The concentration
needed to lip read, pick out the words or follow the thread of sentences would
have been too much in a group situation. To listen to others talking amongst
themselves is a renewed experience for me. The rules of lip reading need a one
on one frontal approach for ideal conditions, so here was I looking for faces
not aimed at me. Thinking that anything I can hear must be intended
specifically for me but, of course, I was now one of a group. Old habits will
need to be adjusted and relaxed.
It
is customary on the first morning of the week’s work, after breakfast, for the
site supervisors to introduce themselves to the newcomers and first timers to
the site. For the first time in years I heard (in the hush of the communal
marquee) the names and responsibilities of those speaking around me. When it
was my turn, I proudly stood up and announced that I was a deaf person and that
I would need some consideration and help at times. I explained that I had only
been hearing with my implant for three days and some things would be difficult
but how delighted I was to be able to stand there and listen to them properly this
time. After the crowd moved on about their day’s work I was left to have a few
words with friends.
I
walked out to the large excavation site. The wind was blowing around my
microphone. In the past this effect destroyed any chance of hearing what is
said. I stepped down into the hole and asked for an update on what had been
happening from the trench supervisor (one of the quietest speaking men I know
in Norfolk) and we were joined by another digger adding in information. We
stand and have a three way discussion with questions, answers and explanations.
All understood and processed for later. No writing things down for me to read
or waiting for a quiet time later when conditions would be better but less
convenient.
On
the definitely good side is that, after just one day here, those people I know
best (especially with a distinct accent to latch on to) are already having
their familiar voices superimposed upon what I am actually hearing. This is an
amazing sensation similar to when I ‘hear’ a voice in my head during silent lip
reading lessons. Everyone else remains with the same identical robotic sound,
especially when heard from behind unexpectedly when their identity is not known.
There is no instant recognition without sight to confirm or initiate the
expected sound of their voice. I notice, as the size of the crowd diminishes,
the voices left behind by the few still talking become clearer until the last
one is heard very well. The talking over each other removes any word recognition
unless there is something distinctive about it. Otherwise I have no way of
knowing (without looking) when people move or leave. The sounds remain at a
constant level not reflecting the dynamics of the movement going on around me.
When the tent is empty the voices remain in my head because now they are
outside and out of sight. This long forgotten experience now seems so strange.
Knowing something is there without actually seeing it for confirmation!
An observation.
I
hear a distinct voice (I can identify the patterns of speech) and look around
to see who it is standing out amongst the chatter. When I get lip reading sync
with the individual words I detect, I can concentrate and home in on them in
front of me. The words then become clearer with a combination of sounds helping
my lip reading and lip reading helping the words. I look at the eye movement to
identify the companion speaker when the lips stop but the same sounding voice
continues without a noticeable pause. When they, in turn, stop moving their
lips I look back at the first person only to find they are eating not speaking.
The words are continuing so it must be someone else’s conversation taking over
my attention because I have no sense of change or direction in a crowd. This is
all happening about twenty feet away from me. The second conversation is
finally detected by looking around at ten feet to my right. So there is no
distance detected only loud or soft sounds with good and bad perception which
are then confused even more by naturally individual loud and soft speakers. I
look again at the second conversation because it was noticeable but those
people have now got up and left and I didn’t hear them go amongst the
background noises. Because we are in a grass field there are no dragging chair
legs or hard heels resounding on hard floors to announce someone is getting up
or moving. The words, however, are still there and continuous so now they must
be coming from somewhere else.
Not
all these conversations have recognisable words in them, which makes it
difficult to know if the problem is my processor not picking up the sounds
clearly because they are too far away or my brain not interpreting the sounds
properly when it gets them. Is my battery power getting low or are the speakers
just too softly spoken? These are just some of the confusions and
misunderstanding so far.
I am sure there will be many more to come.
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